Hi folks

I run music/songwriting workshops and stuff like that, with kids in schools and community centres. Currently involved in a 'band development' workshop for young bands - helping them in rehearsal and performance issues.

However, one issue has come up for this one band, which I'm going to need a bit of help and research to deal with. Lead singer nervousness! The singer of this punk/pop band is a 17/18-year-old girl. She has a really good voice, but 'feels like a tit' when she sings, resulting in a rather standoffish demeanour and lack of stage presence. She (and her mother!) have expressed an interest in finding a way round this. No-one expects her to start leaping about like a maniac, but little bit of passion, movement, and engagement with the songs is hoped for - and it's good old self-consciousness that is the obstacle.

As a live performer, I've been a keyboard player, so not the focus of the band, and I've always just had to concentrate on what I'm doing while trying to give an air of 'getting into it' - I'm not the most experienced in overcoming self-consciousness and giving it your all.

I'm looking for tips, techniques, philosophies and exercises to help this girl overcome her self-consciousness. Please discuss!

Thanks

Hi, as a singer , songwriter and performer for more years than I care to remember I would suggest choice of material is a good place to start.Choose songs/words that she can relate to and actually bring the words alive.Also record her in a private session so that she can hear herself and if she has a good voice this should encourage her....it did me!! cheers Dave

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My head hurts!

See if you can get a singer to come in and do a workshop with her. Sometimes they just need to be shown how stupid you look when you're up on stage rocking out...and realise that looking cool on stage most of the time looks stupid!

After that it's just experience and doing it day in and day out. I know there was a time when it just clicked and thought "If I don't look as though I'm enjoying it, are the audience gonna feel like they want to enjoy it." Then I didn't have a problem making a fool out of myself as the lead, cause I firmly believe that you can't have loads of fun without looking stupid!

Though I agree with getting her recorded with full production. Does help if you have a track you can listen to and say "Yeah...I DO rock!"

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www.exaviormusic.com
www.manninmusic.com Music Teacher, Isle of Man

Edited by Exavior Music (23/02/09 07:41 PM)

Hmm tricky,

I'm also a singer, and whilst I agree with Turbo Dave, I think there's more too it, You could give her a load of songs she loves, yet she'll still 'feel like a tit' because she'll be holding back... and thats really what it's about. Letting go, taking the risk, I guess is a bit of a scary step.
However, she will be aware (and if she isn't, you should tell her) that if she stands there like a plank, she'll look like even more of a tit!
has she performed to an audience yet? or is it just yourself and small groups thats she's performed to? There is so much more pressure when you have an audience, and it's far easier to leap around when your buzzing on that energy, where as to a small group, especially of people who know you, it's far harder, (and even more so when you've already stood there looking like a plank) to 'perform' because then your breaking their expectations, which is kinda worse!... like I said tricky!

I think the best way would be to break her in gently, actually give her the precise movements you want her to make, so she's taking the direction from you, and is just following orders
DON'T say vague stuff like 'give it more energy'...'can you dance around a bit' .... 'give me more emotion' etc etc (she'll probably panic and shrivel '[ ****** ] what am i gonna do???')

if you tell her what to do..she's not being asked to take a risk, it's not coming from her, so if it looks [ ****** ],it's your fault not hers,she obviously respects you as well so if you tell her what to do, she won't think it's [ ****** ]... see the psychological process here? just bite size pieces,concentrate on her movement not her 'voice'(as you say her voice isn't so much the problem,emotion/energy will come with the confidence) and work on one song, give her gestures to make,get her moving her arms (in specific parts lines of the song)... get her to walk left walk right(again tell her exactly when to do this)
Keep it simple. and 'big her up' seriously, make her feel great, and encourage her every time she does the move or whatever.

What you are doing is just breaking her in very gently, don't be foolish enough to think that she doesn't know what to do, that she hasn't thought about things she can do in her own head.. she will have done! may be great may be crap but she's definitely thought of something!!she's just scared of letting go! in case it's wrong or [ ****** ].

if you can build up so as she's doing something for every line of the song even if it's purposely doing nothing, you are giving her a 'format' you'll notice she'll start to put her own stuff in, because as she's got stuff to do already, it's not so much of a 'big deal' anymore,
she'll forget bits and substitute them for her own, you've boosted her confidence by giving her direction she might even start to really come out of her shell, because she thinks she can do better! If she is still sheepish at this stage...try subtly taking the pressure off her by making her feel really stupid, getting anyone else who's around to do for example random over exaggerated rock poses,include her in this, (but don't make it about her) this will make everyone look like a tit,expose her 'tittiness', ..once she feels comfortable within the band, she'll know they're behind her on stage,and that they have a certain 'expectation of her' that will be stronger motivation,than any audience!

Oh, and once she's got the tune,the moves, the words to think about... she'll have less space in her head to think about the nerves, if she is confident in whats she's got to do, then the nerves will be positive ones and not negative ones! )


There's a great series on Expert Village, take a look!

http://www.expertvillage.com/search.htm?s=stage+presence

Drink

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Me? But I`m such a loveable old bugger!

lol! yep it helps!

Quote IvanSC:

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Drink

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C'mon !! lets not bring this girl down to our depraved level! Hicc!

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My head hurts!

Admiration from other outside people....

after a few years of getting it, she will believe it, and then there will be no stopping her....

so, GIG GIG GIG GIG GIG & GIG GIG

is she doing this stuff in front of friends? how is she in front of complete strangers?

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J90
Sonic Visions

Worth trying some of the warm up techniques used in acting/drama etc. Go over the top with being a tit behind closed doors so that you feel less of a tit when you rein it in a bit on stage...

Quote IvanSC:

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Drink

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Damn straight.

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I'm All Ears.

There's a lot you can do, but ultimately which way she chooses will have to come from her.

I used to run a music society a number of years ago for any level of musician including some who just came along to listen. We found it worked best when the group that turned up split into several sections. There were usually some in the bar getting to know each other, some playing on stage and some listening to those on stage. I believe all 3 elements were crucial in how the musicians developed. The group in the bar may have seemed to be the slackers, but when it came to getting on stage, they were already comfortable with the others around them. The audience was watching what happened and provided feedback for those on stage. Then the groups would mix up a bit, completely informal.

It worked for some, didn't for others. Whereas guitarists, etc were generally happy with jamming and winging it, very few singers would ad lib. So the more they'd been able to plan ahead the better. It ended up with singers telling people what they wanted to sing one week and then trying it out the next.

I've also been through the same process with a few singers. The obvious one is reinforcing their belief in themselves as a good musician. Less obvious is the fact that being on stage for many people is an act, so perhaps help her write a script of what to say to the audience, when to fill the gaps (especially if a guitarist is tuning down), how to handle breaks between sets and finishing off.

Also figure out who leads the band. I've always noticed that one or two musicians in a band are the quickest at getting the band out of problems, e.g. if the singer's gone for a verse instead of a chorus. It's helped us to have rules (i.e. the rest of the band follow the singer, if the singer's lost, then follow the guitarist). Most of these just develop and it's kind of odd to vocalise them. That confidence that it will be alright no matter what happens is invaluable.

Now as for the stage act. Do you know how she wants to project herself? It could be worth finding videos of similar characters. I'd recommend watching the difference between something by Blondie and Guano Apes (the promo video for "Open Your Eyes" comes to mind, but I think there's concert footage of "Pretty in Scarlet"). Something in between would be Lacuna Coil. No doubt, she and the rest of the band have their own influences they could watch and learn from.

I'd second the opinion that knowing the music helps a lot. If you know what you're meant to be doing music-wise, then you can look at your stage act.

Another point from one of my past singers: keep the set-list consistent. If the singer knows what's coming, again it's easier to deal with.

For me, it largely comes down to getting everything musical sorted out with the band first including how the monitor sounds to her, then working on how she'll project that to audiences. I've had a few sessions where I've had to explain the limitations of the kit involved and how it will affect what the singer can hear, but not what the audience will hear.

One other point I've noticed is that nervous singers tend not to want anything to do with setting up the kit beforehand. I find that odd, but it's an observation.

alanw raises a point i was going to mention - the adoption of a persona.

we're not talking ziggy stardust here - just a more exaggerated version of yourself that is immune to criticism and very confident. a lot of performers i know get "into the zone" by basically putting away their "normal" face and putting on their "game face". having a separate wardrobe for stage can help - again, not necessarily costumes, just not things they would wear as their "real" self.

people talk about having to develop a thick skin to deflect criticism - this is just an extension of that. you don't have to worry about being self-conscious, because it's not "you" up there, it's who you want to be...

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hourglass | random thoughts | doubledotdash!? collective

Look into cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) and it's associated techniques. It's generally accepted that it can be very helpful with social anxiety in all it's forms including performance anxiety.

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Original artwork and unique devices inspired by vintage technology http://www.thisisobsolete.com

Quote onesecondglance:

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alanw raises a point i was going to mention - the adoption of a persona.

we're not talking ziggy stardust here - just a more exaggerated version of yourself that is immune to criticism and very confident. a lot of performers i know get "into the zone" by basically putting away their "normal" face and putting on their "game face". having a separate wardrobe for stage can help - again, not necessarily costumes, just not things they would wear as their "real" self.

people talk about having to develop a thick skin to deflect criticism - this is just an extension of that. you don't have to worry about being self-conscious, because it's not "you" up there, it's who you want to be...

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Bingo. Couldn't have said it better myself.

That's exactly what I do.

I'm normally shy and introverted, but put me on a stage with a half decent keyboard to play and I literally become someone else for two hours.

It's a lot of fun.

Very early on in my live playing days, I learned that the audience haven't paid the venues entrance fee to see someone staring at their navel for a couple of hours. They want entertaining. That means smiling and engaging with the audience. OK, for a keyboard player that just means playing well, but there are different degrees of that. Looking up and at the audience and other band members is essential. So is smiling.
Moving is another thing. If you don't feel the music and show that you're feeling it, you can't expect the audience to. Standing still/rigid/bolt upright isn't generally seen a good thing.

For me, I started off spending most of the gig looking down at my hands worried about making mistakes. Nowadays, I spend more time looking up and at the crowd and other band members than I do looking down at my hands. The more you do it, the more confident you become. I now play the 'did anyone notice my mistake?' game with the band. We all do it. Fluff a chord or run and look up to see if anyone in the band noticed. How you recover from the mistakes is half the fun, especially when you are playing with pro's. When we all play that game, we're all looking at each other and smiling. That comes across to the crowd and they have a good time as well.

As mentioned above, it's not as drastic as Bruce Wayne/Batman, but it is the adoption of a second persona.
Let that person run/jump around and do the stuff that would normally be classed as 'looking like a berk'. On stage, that sort of thing is normal, really it is (remember, showbiz is not a real world). A guitarist putting one leg on a wedge monitor during a solo may look weird in rehearsal, but done at the right time during a gig, it still looks entertaining.

It's a bit chicken and egg. You can't rehearse playing in front of a real audience of strangers, but you need to play in front of strangers in order to get used to the attention.
Like it or not a lead singer will be the centre of attention, especially when the music stops.

In his early days with Genesis, Peter Gabriel was so shy, the other band members introduced the songs. But, with most of their songs requiring different guitar tunings, the gaps between the songs were sometimes several minutes. As the lead singer and centre of attention, it was down to him to keep the audience engaged until the band were ready for the next song. After a while, he started telling stories between the songs. He then took this further by using costumes and make-up to play the parts of characters within the songs. A bit extreme, but an example nonetheless.

My muso alter ego has done some pretty amazing things, from regularly playing to 400 people in local pubs to standing solo on stage at The Royal Albert Hall. The fear/terror doesn't really go away. That's part of the buzz of playing live. Applause from the crowd is another part. That's the addictive part. It's reward for an entertaining performance. The more you put into the performance, the better the reward (unless you're in a really rough pub with chicken wire between you and the crowd. In those cases, play your set, grab your money and run!!!!).
As said above, it's something that I can switch on and off. It also comes in handy away from music.
For instance, standing up in a meeting and giving a presentation at work. It's the same sort of buzz.

Knowing when to switch off is important as well.
It doesn't look so good when I trash the flip chart and make out with the secretary on the boardroom table after winding up my presentations, but hopefully you can see where I'm going here.

Be confident.
Be entertaining.
Have fun.

HTH.

Stu.

Thanks for the wealth of info here, it's given me some great ideas, which I'm preparing for tomorrow's workshop.

I had some other ideas of my own, just exercises to get her off the starting blocks and moving about, what do you think of the following:

* During a song run-through, take away the mic stand and tell her she's not allowed to stand still while singing. She can close her eyes, look wherever she wants, walk wherever she wants, do whatever she wants, as long as she keeps moving and singing. The others in the band (apart from drums) also have to do the same thing (to take the pressure off her a bit).

* Tell her to pretend that the mic stand is holding her up because she feels dizzy, and will fall over if she doesn't literally hang on to it to support her weight, and also that the mic stinks of dogshit so that between lines she has to move it away from her mouth! This MIGHT engender a bit of a rocknroll hanging-off-the-mic-stand snarling and grooving about? - just a bit of fun of course...

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Alex

Edited by Mudchild (27/02/09 10:13 AM)

Quote Mudchild:

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* Tell her to pretend that the mic stand is holding her up because she feels dizzy, and will fall over if she doesn't literally hang on to it to support her weight, and also that the mic stinks of dogshit so that between lines she has to move it away from her mouth! This MIGHT engender a bit of a rocknroll hanging-off-the-mic-stand snarling and grooving about? - just a bit of fun of course...

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Not sure about the mic thing...as a sound guy I wouldn't want to encourage bad mic technique! But the stand thing is a good idea, as is taking it away.

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www.exaviormusic.com
www.manninmusic.com Music Teacher, Isle of Man

i dunno... if she's feeling self-conscious already, "fun" exercises like pretending the mic stand is holding her up will just distract her. i'd say she needs to get into the moment instead of concentrating too hard on actively moving around.

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hourglass | random thoughts | doubledotdash!? collective

Take her to see a play with good actors.
Then ask her how she relates to the actor. If the actor is in any way good, she should just see the character and not the actor even if she knows the actor.

Try to get it in to her head that other audiences will see her in the same way as she saw the actor.

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Disclaimer: Advice is taken at your own risk.

I used to be very nervous playing in front of people. Experience has helped to a large extent, but there's also a CD called "Self-hypnosis for Musicians" which made a real difference for me, particularly an exercise which got you to imagine being your favourite performer on stage. I won't go into the details, partly because anticipating it would spoil the effect for anyone using the CD, and also because it sounds a bit weird when you describe it, but it worked amazingly for me.

Being in the process of training up a second not-very-experienced singer in our band, we all agreed that the single most important thing is knowing the song well enough that they no longer have to work to remember what comes next! Seems obvious, but if you're rushing to get gigging ("yeah, you're singing that OK from the sheet of paper, now let's get a gig next week") then they just might not feel they know it well enough.

And steal their mic stand! A mic stand gives them something to hide behind, and hands can go in pockets or behind their back or hang stiffly at their side, and they need to focus on staying on mic. If you're holding the mic, there's nothing between you and the audience, one hand is automatically occupied, and the mic will always follow them as they move.

that's a good point about memorising parts - it is oft said that the first thing a vocalist will do when they get nervous is forget the words.

only when you're confident you can step up there and do your part backwards can you relax enough to enjoy yourself.

it also helps that my performing alter-ego never makes mistakes - they're just improvisations...

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hourglass | random thoughts | doubledotdash!? collective

I know it's not the quick fix you possibly wanted to hear but Ed_J90 said it best: GIG.

And then keep gigging. It's the ONLY way you can genuinely find "yourself" (Jesus, that sounds dangerously close to happy, clappy bullcr@p for my liking) on stage.

And I'm speaking from experience as the lead singer/guitarist for my group of electro-rock noisers (bless their little hearts).

No amount of therapy, visualization, tough love, nice love, luke warm or slightly tepid love will ever replace the benefit you get of doing it for real in front of a crowd that possibly couldn't care if you live or die (and are maybe even gunning for the latter if you're having a bad night). Yes it is a bit make or break and yes it will be hellishly difficult but if she keeps on then she'll either find her feet, develop her stage persona and be able to "draw" an audience in...or...she'll realise she's not actually cut out for it in the first place. And if she isn't, it's better to find out rather than to go on deluding herself.

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www.myspace.com/thisburningage......www.thisburningage.com

Quote Friday:

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Yes it is a bit make or break and yes it will be hellishly difficult but if she keeps on then she'll either find her feet, develop her stage persona and be able to "draw" an audience in...or...she'll realise she's not actually cut out for it in the first place. And if she isn't, it's better to find out rather than to go on deluding herself.

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That's the part that concerns me. I've seen a few good singers (in a musical sense) drop out of singing with others because they tried gigging too early. Some do take to it straight away, but for others it can be a battle each and every gig. I've always wondered how much preparation is needed in the art of performing before a band takes to the stage.

A bad experience in the first couple of gigs can be incredibly difficult to overcome. The best remedy I've had for this is to play music that the audience will want to move to. One of the worst things is to play to an audience who don't care or even don't want a band on. It may seem like selling out, but playing what the audience wants is a good way to gain confidence and understand what good gigs feel like. Then maybe switch to their own material afterwards.

Ultimately stage fright is the fear of looking a complete ass and being publicly humilated. The only real way to beat it is to become desensitised to in the way we eventually become desensitised to violence on the News on TV. If we see it enougn if concerns us less because we know we can deal with it.So the answer is to perform and perform more until it becomes a comfotable place to be.

After having a curtain open and greeting an audience with total gear failure and total silence, I have known where the worst place to be is. No-one died and when it happend again, I was ready and simply fell about laughing and took the audience with me.

Having done thousands of good shows (and afew howlers), the key is to be prepared and feel confident with your material and your "act". Because the rest is about acting.

I used to hide behind a guitar until I got really bored with the audience at a Soul Motown show we were playing. I decided to become Spinal tap and started pulling shapes for fun. To my amazement, the audience loved it. I've done it ever since and dress up like an idiot - it is more fun than gazing at your shoes for you and the audience.

As a singer you have to recognise that it is about acting - it is called SHOW business and you have to entertain. If you are a good enough actor you can fake sincerity, but getting somewhere near that is a start. LOL

Regards

WAL