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Feedback on new song we're about to pitch to the industry

Postby danproducerman » Sun Sep 25, 2016 3:17 pm

Hi everyone

So me and my co-writer have a new song that we've been advised by a pro songwriter to consider pitching seriously to the industry for publishing. It's called Make it on our own and the production has got a kind of Motown meets country vibe. We'd love to get some idea of what everyone thinks through the Sound on Sound forums so any feedback will be much appreciated!

We've actually been told to possibly aim this at the American country market but wondered what you think?

Cheers everyone. (Link is below)

https://soundcloud.com/danscholesproduc ... -on-vocals
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Re: Feedback on new song we're about to pitch to the industry

Postby alexis » Sun Sep 25, 2016 3:40 pm

Sorry, can't listen to it without signing in to sound cloud.
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Re: Feedback on new song we're about to pitch to the industry

Postby danproducerman » Sun Sep 25, 2016 4:11 pm

That's strange...we've had people listening to it no problem who don't have soundcloud accounts. Just checked it now and there's no issues.
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Re: Feedback on new song we're about to pitch to the industry

Postby alexis » Sun Sep 25, 2016 5:24 pm

Well, the song got me crying, so it must be pretty good, congratulations.

Yeah, I listen to a fair amount of country music, and there is definitely a genre of the country duet, e.g., http://radio.com/2013/09/27/top-10-male ... ew-school/ . And as they don't saturate the airwaves, I could see this definitely having a chance.

Re: "the story" of the song ... I understand it completely for the first 90% - guy wants to get back together, girl says it's over. But as nice as the reconciliation at the end makes one feel, it also got me wondering/confused - why all of a sudden does the girl do a 180 and say she wants to get back together again also? I know there's only so much time allowed in a song, but with no reason given for her change of heart it seems an unlikely ending, and puzzling over that can sort of take one out of the magic of the song a bit (at least it did me). But, it got the tears welling up well before that, so maybe it's not such a big deal!

I know you're asking about the song-writing, but I found the overall 5-star quality of the song somewhat diminished by some minor engineering/producing aspects, actually just one, the voices seemed too far down in the mix at times, the guy much more than the girl. It seems to my novice ears that it's nothing that a little more automation couldn't fix completely though.

And then probably just a personal preference kind of thing rather than an actual issue - the girl's voice sounds like it is just about as familiar and professional sounding as anything on the radio. To me though the guy's voice was missing something ... an edge perhaps, it seemed less emotional than the words he sang. Like I said, it's just a personal preference, FWIW!

Congrats on a job well-done. Good luck pitching it in the contemporary country scene ... I'm rooting for you!

(PS - it was only my phone that required me to sign into Soundcloud for some reason. This desktop took me right there right away).
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Re: Feedback on new song we're about to pitch to the industry

Postby danproducerman » Sun Sep 25, 2016 6:01 pm

Wow Alexis thank you so much for all your comments! Awesome that you liked it that much that it made you cry haha!! Ultimate compliment...thanks.

So regarding the story, totally get what you're saying....our idea was as you say to start with this idea that the man is broken hearted, she has left him and yet you don't know why and you start off feeling sad for him and then the twist comes in the second verse with her explaining it was down to his cheating that she left. As for the turn around, our thinking was that you have these 2 people who are resolute in trying to move on but ultimately the bond they had and talked about in the chorus is too strong for them to stay apart so they end up saying "I can't actually make it on my own and I need you"...does that make sense?

Production wise, one hundred percent agree, vocals could come up a little and I've only realised this last few days...will be remixing in next few days and replacing the file on soundcloud.

Misty definitely has the strongest voice out of the 2 of them I agree but ultimately I'm not too concerned as it's basically there as a demo to showcase to the industry.

Alexis - thank you so much once again for your words of encouragement and support!

Dan
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Re: Feedback on new song we're about to pitch to the industry

Postby petev3.1 » Wed Oct 05, 2016 11:47 am

Not exactly my bag but it sounds commercial. I heard 'Islands in the Stream'... and this is probably a very good thing.
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Re: Feedback on new song we're about to pitch to the industry

Postby danproducerman » Sat Oct 08, 2016 10:46 am

petev3.1 - Thanks so much for checking it out!

I really appreciate your comments especially considering it's not really your bag and totally respect that.

As for the comparison to Islands in the stream, well I'll definitely take that as a compliment and you're not the first person to make that comparison, in fact somebody else has mentioned they could hear it sung by Kenny and Dolly!

Thanks again for checking it out!
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Re: Feedback on new song we're about to pitch to the industry

Postby I'd Rather Play » Sun Oct 09, 2016 2:31 pm

I've arrived at this post a little late for advice, but it will be interesting to see if my 'advice' chimes with your experience.
You say you intend to pitch this song to publishing companies, why?

Publishing companies don't place songs anymore, they just collect money. You need to pitch your songs to people who can really place them; that's basically managers and management companies.

Pitch it to a manager, let them know you have the publishing to play with and can assign it to them for any track they place; and your prepared to collaborate with the artist on this track. (That is allowing them to change a couple of lines for a 33% share in the song writing.) Which will give you an in for further collaborations.

As a cast iron general rule, simply follow the money trail to predict your best outcome in any negotiations.

Welcome to the real world.
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Re: Feedback on new song we're about to pitch to the industry

Postby desmond » Sun Oct 09, 2016 3:43 pm

Nice job with this. :thumbup:

Other than the vocal levels, I could make some suggestions about things to do but the bottom line is you've got enough there to pitch the song to anyone who is likely interested.

So when I'm hearing this, it has very much the feel of an emotional montage bit in the X-Factor or something similar, which means it's having the right, uplifting emotional feel which is a great point to hit.

Te other thing I wanted to mention is that you've chosen to produce this in a sort of country-pop vain (with a little 60s throwback thing in there as a stylistic choice), but I think this could work equally well produced in a more modern contemporary style with more urban/pop vocals - think "No Air" by Jordin Sparks type of thing - not saying you want to do that, but just that the song seems likely flexible enough to work in different genres, rather than being stuck in one - a definite plus point in it's favour.

I'd have liked to see a few more production flourishes in there for flavour, particularly at the beginning where there is space for a few things, and I'd also have personally made a few more ambitious arrangement things around the climax - where you have the bar that hangs before hitting the last chorus, you could have taken the oppurtunity to really lift it at that point by doing something unexpected - as it is, it kinda does the expected thing and just drops back to the chorus, which feels a *little* bit of a letdown, rather than soaring off for the grand finale. It just takes away what could have been, just a little, for me.

But anyway, these are all choices and regardless, like I say, good job with this!
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Re: Feedback on new song we're about to pitch to the industry

Postby danproducerman » Sun Oct 09, 2016 4:09 pm

Guys I can't thank you enough for the feedback...very encouraging, constructive and informative.

Desmond - really appreciate the positive comments and totally get what you're saying about the production, arrangement in the lead in to final chorus. Gotta say I'm glad you can see other avenues for this other than country and as I've felt for a while it will very much depend on how it is arranged as to which market it may appeal more to.

We've managed to gather a fair number of plays on soundcloud and we've had some good feedback from other quarters as well. Now we're just starting to look at the best angle to pitch from and who to approach (label A&Rs, artist management does seem to be the way to go these days). It's just working out the best way of how to get in through the proverbial "closed door" that is the music industry. The less unsolicited approach the better chance we'll have I think.

Thanks again
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